Re: Usenet's Greatest Poet / gjd

On Mon, 24 Mar 2025 18:36:50 +0000, W.Dockery wrote:

Victor H. wrote:

Will Dockery wrote:

Victor H. wrote:

>

George J. Dance wrote:

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Guess Who?

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I'm usenet's greatest poet,
   At least that's what they say.
The Village People love my work
   And I'm not even gay.

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The most prolific poet
    The internet has known,
I've written fifty thousand poems
    In the past week alone.

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I sit at my computer
    And dream of South and North,
And just like vomit from a drunk
    The poems come gushing forth.

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It's sometimes hard to type them,
    They all come out so fast,
And some of them are really long
    While some are just half-vast.

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I've never learned poetics;
    I know that I don't need 'em
Because I simply write the poems;
    Let other people read 'em.

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Oh once Bob Dylan phoned me
    But didn't praise my work
So I hung up on him. He's just
    A pissbum and a jerk.

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I know he's simply jealous,
    Like all those guys, of me.
That's why they bury all my stuff;
    It's a conspiracy.

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I know I could be published
    And everyone would buy,
But knowing the conspiracy
    Why would I even try?

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So I just stay on usenet
    Where true success depends,
Not on your money, or your fame,
    But on your online friends.

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I'm friends with half a dozen
    True poets just like me.
(Sometimes we write, sometimes we fight
    With the conspiracy.)

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They say my poems are perfect,
    And all I have to do
Is thank all six, and tell them all
    Their poems are perfect, too.

>

~~
GJD

What is the count now G.D....

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Does everyone think this poem is about them...?

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I'm sure everyone knows who this poem is about.

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No shit Sherlock.... ha ha...

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Hilarious.

Yes, I thought this one was obvious. The references to the Village
People and Dylan should make it obvious to any future scholars, as there
was only one poet here who's talked to both.
But of course some of the traits described in the poem can be ascribed
to a lot of poets who've graced us. I even had one argument (from the
Asstroll) that the poem was really about me, as I'm the one with the
conspiracy theory. He was referring to my theory about "Team Monkey". In
my defense, that theory was both an attempt to describe reality, and a
parody of one group's theory of "Team Donkey" (the reality here being
that Team Monkey was my name for that group.)
The subject here was a member of Team Monkey, and the 'conspiracy'
theory I'd had in mind was that group's "Team Donkey" theory. Based on
merely the fact that Will Dockery invites every poet he runs into to
join aapc, they theory is that this was a plot by Will and his minions
to fill the group with more of them (called "plants", in an aparent
reference to Invasion of the Body Snatchers), and take over the group
that way.
As Rand said: "Don't bother to examine a folly. Ask yourself only what
it accomplishes." What belief in the "Team Donkey" theory accomplished
was that Team Monkey began seeing every new person  who joined or simply
posted with suspicion as another Team Donkey "plant" - with the
predictable result that over the past 6 years, none of the them have
stayed in the group.