Re: Usenet's Greatest Poet / gjd

>

Guess Who?
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I'm usenet's greatest poet,
At least that's what they say.
The Village People love my work
And I'm not even gay.
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The most prolific poet
The internet has known,
I've written fifty thousand poems
In the past week alone.
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I sit at my computer
And dream of South and North,
And just like vomit from a drunk
The poems come gushing forth.
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It's sometimes hard to type them,
They all come out so fast,
And some of them are really long
While some are just half-vast.
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I've never learned poetics;
I know that I don't need 'em
Because I simply write the poems;
Let other people read 'em.
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Oh once Bob Dylan phoned me
But didn't praise my work
So I hung up on him. He's just
A pissbum and a jerk.
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I know he's simply jealous,
Like all those guys, of me.
That's why they bury all my stuff;
It's a conspiracy.
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I know I could be published
And everyone would buy,
But knowing the conspiracy
Why would I even try?
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So I just stay on usenet
Where true success depends,
Not on your money, or your fame,
But on your online friends.
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I'm friends with half a dozen
True poets just like me.
(Sometimes we write, sometimes we fight
With the conspiracy.)
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They say my poems are perfect,
And all I have to do
Is thank all six, and tell them all
Their poems are perfect, too.
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GJD